How in the name of all that is good, do mothers know, or have an inkling when you are feeling down?
My folks showed up at work today, so that I could take them up to the airport. They are off to Edmonton to spend Xmas with my brother and his family. Admittedly, I have been avoiding phone calls lately. Ya, ya...but this time of year is a difficult one for me.
Anyhoo...we were going out the door and my Mom turned and put something into the palm of my hand. At first I was thinking, "why are you giving me a button?" But I opened my hand and it was one of those silver "worry stones" with an inscription on one side that read "Believe in miracles". How did she know???
She told me to rub it anytime that I was feeling stressed about things. God, I'll rub the finish off of it within the week! All kidding aside, I think that is THE most special gift that I could have received. Just knowing that someone is in tune with how I have been feeling lately. That I don't have to put into words the struggles that I feel. Knowing (assuming) that someone out there finally "gets it".
So I am going to try to believe in miracles. Miracles happen all the time to people. I have to believe that a miracle could happen for Darren and I too. My miracle wish would be that those of us waiting for our little one from China will be coming home to us really soon. Really, really soon.
I love you, Mom. Thank you for believing in miracles.
Saturday, December 23, 2006
Friday, December 22, 2006
New Rules coming down the pipeline from China...
Here is the low-down on the new requirements from China that will affect all prospective adoptive parents that are applying to adopt a Chinese child. Word is that these new rules may not take effect until May 1st, 2007. But the scuttlebutt is that the health requirements begin NOW and could affect those that have dossiers already logged into the system. Read on, get comfy....
At present, the number of adoption application documents that the China Centre of Adoption Affairs (hereafter referred to as CCAA) receives is increasing very fast. However, the limited number of Chinese children available for inter-country adoption is far from being able to meet the demand of families from overseas. The CCAA maintains, in accordance with the principle of protecting the best interests of children in the Convention on Protection of Children and Co-Operation in Respect of Inter-Country Adoption (hereafter referred to as Hague Adoption Convention), that adopters in the following conditions answer better to the spirit of Hague Adoption Convention and the provisions of adoption law in both China and your country, and are able to offer the Chinese children adopted the best possible environment to grow in. It is our hope that you read this letter attentively, screen the families and give priority to those in the following conditions, and submit the adoption applicationdocuments for them:
The CCAA first accepts and reviews adoption applications of foreign adopters who are qualified with the following conditions from the day of 1st May 2007, and then makes placement of adoptees with them. Adoption applications of the other adopters who are not qualified will be put into considerations after all the cases of the qualified have already been dealt with.
I. The adopters are a couple of one male and one female with a stable marital relationship. In case that both the husband and the wife do not have any ex-marriage, the length of marriage has to reach two years. In the case either the husband or wife has ex-marriages (not more than 2), the length of the current marriage has to reach 5 years.
II. Both the husband and wife have reached the age of 30 and are under 50. For adoption of special needs child, both of them should have reached the age of 30 and are under 55.
III. Both the husband and wife are fully healthy physically and mentally, and do not have the following conditions:
1. AIDS;2. Mental handicap;3. Infectious disease within infective stage;4. Binocular blind or binocular parallax or monocular blind and with no ocular prosthesis;5. Binaural hearing loss or language function loss; adoption of special needs children who have identical conditions will be exempt from this limitation;6. Afunction or dysfunction of limbs or trunk caused by impairment, incompleteness, numbness or deformation; severe facial deformation;7. Severe diseases which require long term treatment and which affect life expectancy, like malignant tumor, lupus erythematosus, nephrosis, epilepsy, and ect.;8. Post-surgery of major organs transplantation, not yet 10 years;9. Schizophrenia;10. Medication for severe mental disorders, like depression, mania, or anxiety neurosis and etc. stopped not more than 2 years;11. BMI > or = 40.
IV. Either the husband or wife holds a stable occupation. The family annual income reaches $10,000 for each family member including the prospective adoptee and the family net assets value should reach $80,000. The family annual income does not include welfare income, like relief fund, pension, unemployment insurance, or government subsidy, and etc.
V. Both the husband and wife have received education of or above the level of senior high school, or vocational skills training of the same level.
VI. The number of children in family under the age of 18 years does not reach 5, and the youngest one should have reached the age of 1 year. Adoption of special needs children will be exempt from the limitation of “the number of children in family under the age of 18 years does not reach 5″.
VII. Both the husband and wife have never come under any criminal sanction. And they behave honorably with good moral characters and abide by regulations and laws. Both of them do not accord with the following situations:1. Have a history of domestic violence, sex abuse, abandonment or abuse of children (even if they are not consequently arrested or criminated);2. Have a history of taking narcotics like opium, morphine, marijuana, cocaine, heroin, methamphetamines, and etc. and medication for mental diseases, with are able to arouse addiction among human beings;3. Have a history of alcohol abuse and have given up drinking not more than 10 years ago.
Adoption application will be given consideration on a case by case basis when either the husband or wife has less than 3 criminal records of slight severity with no severe outcomes, and the time for correction of wrong has reached 10 years, or has less than 5 records of traffic law violation with no severe outcomes.
VIII. The adopters are able to have a correct cognition of adoption, and expect to provide a warm family for the orphaned children (or children with handicap and disability) via adoption and to meet the needs of the children adopted for the sake of a good development of them. They have a correct cognition of inter-country adoption as well, and are fully mentally-prepared for the potential risks within inter-country adoption and for the situations of children adopted as potential diseases, developmental delays, post-placement maladjustment, and etc.
IX. The adopters make in the adoption application letter clear promise of being able to accept post-placement follow-ups and offer post-placement reports as required.
X. The fixed number of year or age that appears in this letter shall be dated from the day when the adoption application documents are logged in at the CCAA.
The CCAA expects sincerely to cooperate with you and to provide better services for the adopters and children adopted and to help the Chinese children adopted develop in a family full of happiness, love and understanding. Thank you very much for your understanding and assistance.
The CCAA is responsible for the interpretation of this letter. Agencies should direct any specific questions to China Centre of Adoption Affairs(copied from the Rumour Queen web site)
These new requirement won't really affect us. At least not that I can see, barring one of us getting ill. God forbid! But it breaks my heart to think of all those couples, and families that will be affected by these changes. You put your heart and soul into this process. You have pictured your future child over and over again. Only to be told "sorry, you no longer meet the requirements". I can't imagine what that would feel like. But I guess that is something that we should be prepared for in the adoption journey. Nothing is guaranteed.
Someone suggested that this might be a good thing in that it will speed up the process since the number of families eligible to adopt from China will be diminished. That certainly does not make me smile. No one wants to benefit from the disappointment of others. These people have gone through a thorough process. They have been deemed to be awesome parents, regardless of their BMI, past health issues or marital status. Who's to say that skinny people that have never been diagnosed with a health issue will make better parents?? There are so many people out there that have so much love to give. Who long to be parents. Who were given hope, only to have it taken away.
Merry freakin Xmas.
At present, the number of adoption application documents that the China Centre of Adoption Affairs (hereafter referred to as CCAA) receives is increasing very fast. However, the limited number of Chinese children available for inter-country adoption is far from being able to meet the demand of families from overseas. The CCAA maintains, in accordance with the principle of protecting the best interests of children in the Convention on Protection of Children and Co-Operation in Respect of Inter-Country Adoption (hereafter referred to as Hague Adoption Convention), that adopters in the following conditions answer better to the spirit of Hague Adoption Convention and the provisions of adoption law in both China and your country, and are able to offer the Chinese children adopted the best possible environment to grow in. It is our hope that you read this letter attentively, screen the families and give priority to those in the following conditions, and submit the adoption applicationdocuments for them:
The CCAA first accepts and reviews adoption applications of foreign adopters who are qualified with the following conditions from the day of 1st May 2007, and then makes placement of adoptees with them. Adoption applications of the other adopters who are not qualified will be put into considerations after all the cases of the qualified have already been dealt with.
I. The adopters are a couple of one male and one female with a stable marital relationship. In case that both the husband and the wife do not have any ex-marriage, the length of marriage has to reach two years. In the case either the husband or wife has ex-marriages (not more than 2), the length of the current marriage has to reach 5 years.
II. Both the husband and wife have reached the age of 30 and are under 50. For adoption of special needs child, both of them should have reached the age of 30 and are under 55.
III. Both the husband and wife are fully healthy physically and mentally, and do not have the following conditions:
1. AIDS;2. Mental handicap;3. Infectious disease within infective stage;4. Binocular blind or binocular parallax or monocular blind and with no ocular prosthesis;5. Binaural hearing loss or language function loss; adoption of special needs children who have identical conditions will be exempt from this limitation;6. Afunction or dysfunction of limbs or trunk caused by impairment, incompleteness, numbness or deformation; severe facial deformation;7. Severe diseases which require long term treatment and which affect life expectancy, like malignant tumor, lupus erythematosus, nephrosis, epilepsy, and ect.;8. Post-surgery of major organs transplantation, not yet 10 years;9. Schizophrenia;10. Medication for severe mental disorders, like depression, mania, or anxiety neurosis and etc. stopped not more than 2 years;11. BMI > or = 40.
IV. Either the husband or wife holds a stable occupation. The family annual income reaches $10,000 for each family member including the prospective adoptee and the family net assets value should reach $80,000. The family annual income does not include welfare income, like relief fund, pension, unemployment insurance, or government subsidy, and etc.
V. Both the husband and wife have received education of or above the level of senior high school, or vocational skills training of the same level.
VI. The number of children in family under the age of 18 years does not reach 5, and the youngest one should have reached the age of 1 year. Adoption of special needs children will be exempt from the limitation of “the number of children in family under the age of 18 years does not reach 5″.
VII. Both the husband and wife have never come under any criminal sanction. And they behave honorably with good moral characters and abide by regulations and laws. Both of them do not accord with the following situations:1. Have a history of domestic violence, sex abuse, abandonment or abuse of children (even if they are not consequently arrested or criminated);2. Have a history of taking narcotics like opium, morphine, marijuana, cocaine, heroin, methamphetamines, and etc. and medication for mental diseases, with are able to arouse addiction among human beings;3. Have a history of alcohol abuse and have given up drinking not more than 10 years ago.
Adoption application will be given consideration on a case by case basis when either the husband or wife has less than 3 criminal records of slight severity with no severe outcomes, and the time for correction of wrong has reached 10 years, or has less than 5 records of traffic law violation with no severe outcomes.
VIII. The adopters are able to have a correct cognition of adoption, and expect to provide a warm family for the orphaned children (or children with handicap and disability) via adoption and to meet the needs of the children adopted for the sake of a good development of them. They have a correct cognition of inter-country adoption as well, and are fully mentally-prepared for the potential risks within inter-country adoption and for the situations of children adopted as potential diseases, developmental delays, post-placement maladjustment, and etc.
IX. The adopters make in the adoption application letter clear promise of being able to accept post-placement follow-ups and offer post-placement reports as required.
X. The fixed number of year or age that appears in this letter shall be dated from the day when the adoption application documents are logged in at the CCAA.
The CCAA expects sincerely to cooperate with you and to provide better services for the adopters and children adopted and to help the Chinese children adopted develop in a family full of happiness, love and understanding. Thank you very much for your understanding and assistance.
The CCAA is responsible for the interpretation of this letter. Agencies should direct any specific questions to China Centre of Adoption Affairs(copied from the Rumour Queen web site)
These new requirement won't really affect us. At least not that I can see, barring one of us getting ill. God forbid! But it breaks my heart to think of all those couples, and families that will be affected by these changes. You put your heart and soul into this process. You have pictured your future child over and over again. Only to be told "sorry, you no longer meet the requirements". I can't imagine what that would feel like. But I guess that is something that we should be prepared for in the adoption journey. Nothing is guaranteed.
Someone suggested that this might be a good thing in that it will speed up the process since the number of families eligible to adopt from China will be diminished. That certainly does not make me smile. No one wants to benefit from the disappointment of others. These people have gone through a thorough process. They have been deemed to be awesome parents, regardless of their BMI, past health issues or marital status. Who's to say that skinny people that have never been diagnosed with a health issue will make better parents?? There are so many people out there that have so much love to give. Who long to be parents. Who were given hope, only to have it taken away.
Merry freakin Xmas.
Sunday, December 17, 2006
a new tactic...
Maybe tactic is not the right word. A new direction might be apropos. Effort is the key word here. It's something that I feel has been lacking of late. On my part, of course. On others? Perhaps. Yes, I think so.
What efforts need to made, you ask? I think that more needs to be done than simply going through the motions of life in general. Take the xmas season for example. For those that know me, I am a scrooge of sorts. I don't begrudge giving. In fact, I think that is the part that I enjoy most about xmas. I love the gift giving to family and friends rather than the receiving part. 'Cause let's face it, what I want money cannot buy.
But I made an effort today. I actually put up the xmas tree today. EGADS! Yes, my friends, it went up before the 23rd of December. And do you want to know something else? Wait for it, because you might need to sit down when I tell you. I was actually enjoying myself. It might have something to do with the fact that I was listening to Stuart Mclean on CBC, and laughing at the imperfect stories about xmas. Perfection is over-rated! And as I type, I am enjoying a glass of shiraz in honour of the xmas sing along that we will be participating in tonight. (thruth be told, I am right up there with Mili Vanilli and the whole lip-synching deal)
Effort. I am going to make more of an effort to be more communicative. You have asked for it, so don't get upset if I call you on it. You may not like what I have to say. If you ask me what's wrong, it may not come out right away. But I am (eventually, just give me a minute) tell you exactly what I am feeling at that very moment. It's not personal. It's just how I am feeling about whatever. I will do my best to put anger aside and think things through before I open my mouth. I have always been so reluctant to let it all out, lest I hurt feelings. And the result is that I am angry, and others go around scratching their head wondering what it is that they might have done. I am, as always, a work in progress.
And I hope that I receive effort. Effort in making relationships and all that go with it a priority. You can't buy that. And that is what I wish for most. Thoughtfulness...taking an active role...picking up the phone...I haven't forgotten that effort is a two way street. The deal is that I hold up my end, but I hope that there will be reciprocation. I want to feel that there is effort made on all sides.
I am a wife, a sister, a daughter, and a friend. I don't need titles to feel as if I am loved. I am not seeking affirmations that I am an important person. It's not about that. I need to feel that we are equally putting in the effort. I am going to truely put more effort in on my part. I hope that you will join me.
That is my confusing, self-serving rant for the day.
What efforts need to made, you ask? I think that more needs to be done than simply going through the motions of life in general. Take the xmas season for example. For those that know me, I am a scrooge of sorts. I don't begrudge giving. In fact, I think that is the part that I enjoy most about xmas. I love the gift giving to family and friends rather than the receiving part. 'Cause let's face it, what I want money cannot buy.
But I made an effort today. I actually put up the xmas tree today. EGADS! Yes, my friends, it went up before the 23rd of December. And do you want to know something else? Wait for it, because you might need to sit down when I tell you. I was actually enjoying myself. It might have something to do with the fact that I was listening to Stuart Mclean on CBC, and laughing at the imperfect stories about xmas. Perfection is over-rated! And as I type, I am enjoying a glass of shiraz in honour of the xmas sing along that we will be participating in tonight. (thruth be told, I am right up there with Mili Vanilli and the whole lip-synching deal)
Effort. I am going to make more of an effort to be more communicative. You have asked for it, so don't get upset if I call you on it. You may not like what I have to say. If you ask me what's wrong, it may not come out right away. But I am (eventually, just give me a minute) tell you exactly what I am feeling at that very moment. It's not personal. It's just how I am feeling about whatever. I will do my best to put anger aside and think things through before I open my mouth. I have always been so reluctant to let it all out, lest I hurt feelings. And the result is that I am angry, and others go around scratching their head wondering what it is that they might have done. I am, as always, a work in progress.
And I hope that I receive effort. Effort in making relationships and all that go with it a priority. You can't buy that. And that is what I wish for most. Thoughtfulness...taking an active role...picking up the phone...I haven't forgotten that effort is a two way street. The deal is that I hold up my end, but I hope that there will be reciprocation. I want to feel that there is effort made on all sides.
I am a wife, a sister, a daughter, and a friend. I don't need titles to feel as if I am loved. I am not seeking affirmations that I am an important person. It's not about that. I need to feel that we are equally putting in the effort. I am going to truely put more effort in on my part. I hope that you will join me.
That is my confusing, self-serving rant for the day.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
The results of hardwork and time invested
My adult life has certainly been different than my school years. I have worked hard, and have seen the results of the effort put in. Be that climbing the ladders of responsibility at work, relationships, or running. Most of those goals reached have had relatively instant gratification along the way. Our new journey has proved to be a trying one.
All the time, money, hormone injections, tears, soul searching, intense home studies and not to mention paper work have not shown the instant gratification that we have come to expect in life. We have played by the rules and jumped through the hoops to get us to this point. "Wait. Be patient. Everything will happen when it's supposed to." How often can you take that advice before you give yourself a concussion from all the head banging?
Patience is a virtue. Who came up with that, and how did they come to that conclusion? It's a virtue that I certainly did not inherit. Too bad they don't put that in the school curiculum. That is a life lesson that would not be wasted.
Ok. Get to the point, you say. The word coming down the line from the CCAA (China Centre for Adoption Affairs) is that the wait times will get longer. At this point we are looking at 18 to 24 months from the time the dossier is logged in. We still don't have a log in date for our dossier. I certainly can appreciate all the hard work and long hours that the CCAA put into finding forever families for all the children waiting for a new life. But the void that I need to fill, the wait...it just seems so immense.
A goal to strive for, a new sense of purpose to fill the gap until we go to China? Focus on the little ones that are in our life now? I thought that if I filled my time and kept busy, it would make the time go by a little quicker. At this point it's just not enough. Did we make the right choice? Is this a sign that we should have gone in another direction? Are we meant to be parents? The waiting and the not knowing certainly has brought on the feeling of doubt.
I'm sure that I'm not the only one that feels this way. There are thousands of us in the same position. Comforting? Soemtimes yes, sometimes no.
So....for now I will consume myself in training for the Half Ironman in June. Work hard, train well and there will be results. And we will be six months closer to our dream of a little girl coming home. Our little girl. Our wonderful, beautiful little girl with pigtails in her hair. Where dreams become reality. I'm holding on.
All the time, money, hormone injections, tears, soul searching, intense home studies and not to mention paper work have not shown the instant gratification that we have come to expect in life. We have played by the rules and jumped through the hoops to get us to this point. "Wait. Be patient. Everything will happen when it's supposed to." How often can you take that advice before you give yourself a concussion from all the head banging?
Patience is a virtue. Who came up with that, and how did they come to that conclusion? It's a virtue that I certainly did not inherit. Too bad they don't put that in the school curiculum. That is a life lesson that would not be wasted.
Ok. Get to the point, you say. The word coming down the line from the CCAA (China Centre for Adoption Affairs) is that the wait times will get longer. At this point we are looking at 18 to 24 months from the time the dossier is logged in. We still don't have a log in date for our dossier. I certainly can appreciate all the hard work and long hours that the CCAA put into finding forever families for all the children waiting for a new life. But the void that I need to fill, the wait...it just seems so immense.
A goal to strive for, a new sense of purpose to fill the gap until we go to China? Focus on the little ones that are in our life now? I thought that if I filled my time and kept busy, it would make the time go by a little quicker. At this point it's just not enough. Did we make the right choice? Is this a sign that we should have gone in another direction? Are we meant to be parents? The waiting and the not knowing certainly has brought on the feeling of doubt.
I'm sure that I'm not the only one that feels this way. There are thousands of us in the same position. Comforting? Soemtimes yes, sometimes no.
So....for now I will consume myself in training for the Half Ironman in June. Work hard, train well and there will be results. And we will be six months closer to our dream of a little girl coming home. Our little girl. Our wonderful, beautiful little girl with pigtails in her hair. Where dreams become reality. I'm holding on.
Thursday, December 07, 2006
Who's that looking back at me...
Who do you see looking back at you in the mirror? Take a good long look. Is it the person you thought you would be? How did I get to this place?
There has been a lot of "shoulda, woulda, coulda" going on in my head lately. I should have worked harder in school...and then I would have had more options open to me...and then I could have made different choices. We are the masters of our on destinies, aren't we?
If I had it to do all over again. Hmmm. Would I really want to do it all over again? Let's face it, the teenage years aren't always the most fun. But hindsight is 20/20. If I think about it, and be truely honest, I could have been a good student. I just didn't have any interest in what was going on academically. I could have applied myself, but it was easier to do the bare minimum to get by. I covered it up by convincing myself that I just wasn't smart enough.
Science, math...oooo, at the time it all seemed above my head. Now, I wish that I had worked harder at understanding it. Because there are avenues in life/career that I would have loved to have pursued if only I had taken the time. Hey young people, are you taking note?
And now I find myself at a point of...I don't know how to describe it really. Indecision. Restlessness. Wishing that I could stop time for a moment so that I can figure things out. Wanting more out of life. Needing a purpose.
I look at the rest of the fam. They have all got it figured out, or so it seems. They are smart, productive, motivated and apply themselves. They know what their passions are. How does it come so easily to some? I'm not talking about having a golden horseshoe or anything like that. They just seem to have always had their S*&t together.
And maybe that is just it. I need to find my passion. I think that is one of the hardest things to answer. How do you find that passion?
There has been a lot of "shoulda, woulda, coulda" going on in my head lately. I should have worked harder in school...and then I would have had more options open to me...and then I could have made different choices. We are the masters of our on destinies, aren't we?
If I had it to do all over again. Hmmm. Would I really want to do it all over again? Let's face it, the teenage years aren't always the most fun. But hindsight is 20/20. If I think about it, and be truely honest, I could have been a good student. I just didn't have any interest in what was going on academically. I could have applied myself, but it was easier to do the bare minimum to get by. I covered it up by convincing myself that I just wasn't smart enough.
Science, math...oooo, at the time it all seemed above my head. Now, I wish that I had worked harder at understanding it. Because there are avenues in life/career that I would have loved to have pursued if only I had taken the time. Hey young people, are you taking note?
And now I find myself at a point of...I don't know how to describe it really. Indecision. Restlessness. Wishing that I could stop time for a moment so that I can figure things out. Wanting more out of life. Needing a purpose.
I look at the rest of the fam. They have all got it figured out, or so it seems. They are smart, productive, motivated and apply themselves. They know what their passions are. How does it come so easily to some? I'm not talking about having a golden horseshoe or anything like that. They just seem to have always had their S*&t together.
And maybe that is just it. I need to find my passion. I think that is one of the hardest things to answer. How do you find that passion?
Monday, November 20, 2006
Traditions::Some things you just need to carry on
Yup. Holidays bring with it the traditions that lead up to the "big" day. And today was one of those traditions. Cookie day with Mom. Every year before xmas we set a day to get together and make shortbread cookies. We laugh, we talk, we make a mess and then of course end the day with a massive sugar high. (thank god I run)
It makes me smile. The same recipe that my Grandmother used. The same cookie cutters that I have seen in my Mother's baking drawer all my life. Some things never change. There are some things that I hope never change. This is a tradition that I hope to carry on. Maybe one xmas we'll be really fortunate and have all the little grand-girls together and bake shortbread cookies. I say "grand-girls" because it looks like the grandkids will be all girls. That is if K & C don't have any more kids. (Don't worry Dad. The Family name will be carried on one way or another)
Ok guys. This post is not about baking cookies. I'm sure that there are traditions that mean a lot to you that you want to carry on. Right, Unka Dougie? All I have to say is "gravy". Boy, oh boy. Don't mess with the gravy!
Some things just aren't the same when there is....change. Like not having turkey at thanksgiving. That really threw me off this year. No leftovers. Damn. Like not having your xmas eve tradition at work with your buddy-coworker. That is defitnitely being threatened this year. Hmmm. Must work on that. It would be a shame for the drunk husbands that show up before closing looking to start their xmas shopping if we weren't open on xmas eve.
I love the xmas tradition that Darren and I have. Movies on xmas eve. Sleep in on xmas morning, followed by a peaceful run up at Nymph Falls, followed by lazing around while inhaling the wonderful smell of turkey cooking all afternoon. Easy, breezy, beautiful....turkey coma!
What are some of your favorite traditions?
It makes me smile. The same recipe that my Grandmother used. The same cookie cutters that I have seen in my Mother's baking drawer all my life. Some things never change. There are some things that I hope never change. This is a tradition that I hope to carry on. Maybe one xmas we'll be really fortunate and have all the little grand-girls together and bake shortbread cookies. I say "grand-girls" because it looks like the grandkids will be all girls. That is if K & C don't have any more kids. (Don't worry Dad. The Family name will be carried on one way or another)
Ok guys. This post is not about baking cookies. I'm sure that there are traditions that mean a lot to you that you want to carry on. Right, Unka Dougie? All I have to say is "gravy". Boy, oh boy. Don't mess with the gravy!
Some things just aren't the same when there is....change. Like not having turkey at thanksgiving. That really threw me off this year. No leftovers. Damn. Like not having your xmas eve tradition at work with your buddy-coworker. That is defitnitely being threatened this year. Hmmm. Must work on that. It would be a shame for the drunk husbands that show up before closing looking to start their xmas shopping if we weren't open on xmas eve.
I love the xmas tradition that Darren and I have. Movies on xmas eve. Sleep in on xmas morning, followed by a peaceful run up at Nymph Falls, followed by lazing around while inhaling the wonderful smell of turkey cooking all afternoon. Easy, breezy, beautiful....turkey coma!
What are some of your favorite traditions?
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Xmas...friend or foe
Is it just me or is the xmas silliness starting earlier and earlier every year? The pressure is on to buy just the right gift, and make sure that there is money left over so that you can eat. Don't get me wrong, I love to give gifts. But it's easy to get caught up in the shopping frenzy and get a little crazy.
Perhaps it comes with the territory of working in the retail industry. I'm frazzled at the thought of xmas by the time September rolls around. I need to try harder to let it roll along and get into the spirit of the season...but not yet. IT"S TOO EARLY!! I swear that if they start playing xmas music before December, I will definitely lose it.
I must admit though, that I had a blast shopping for the little people in our life. I'll miss not seeing the excitement on their faces on xmas morning. And to the parents of the little people: don't worry...we didn't get any toys that will be incessant noise makers! hahahhahha.
What would be my ideal way to spend xmas? On the beach, in Tofino. Going for a run on xmas morning with Darren along the beach, and coming back to the cabin with a roaring fire in the fireplace and the smell of turkey in the oven. That would be perfection!
What is your ideal way to spend xmas?
Perhaps it comes with the territory of working in the retail industry. I'm frazzled at the thought of xmas by the time September rolls around. I need to try harder to let it roll along and get into the spirit of the season...but not yet. IT"S TOO EARLY!! I swear that if they start playing xmas music before December, I will definitely lose it.
I must admit though, that I had a blast shopping for the little people in our life. I'll miss not seeing the excitement on their faces on xmas morning. And to the parents of the little people: don't worry...we didn't get any toys that will be incessant noise makers! hahahhahha.
What would be my ideal way to spend xmas? On the beach, in Tofino. Going for a run on xmas morning with Darren along the beach, and coming back to the cabin with a roaring fire in the fireplace and the smell of turkey in the oven. That would be perfection!
What is your ideal way to spend xmas?
Saturday, November 11, 2006
A day for us to remember...
Every year at this time I take a moment to reflect. I am thankful to those that have put country ahead of everything else. And I look at my husband, Captain in the Air Force Reserves, and I am proud.
Today, I was looking around at all those dressed in uniform at the Remembrance Day gathering and felt a sense of gratitude to them and to their families. I thought about my Uncle Tom who has recenlty passed away, and the stories that he has shared about his war years. I never did say "thank you" to him. I wish I had.
As my friend D and I were walking away after the gathering, she was wiping a tear from her eye. Yup, we take for granted what we have here. Freedom. We take for granted the sacrifices that were made for us. We take for granted the sacrifices that are being made for us now. We may not agree with the circumstances that have sent our military into the current "peace keeping" situations. But we need to be supportive of the military personnel that are there now. We need to be supportive of the families that are left behind.
I am fortunate that Darren will not be deployed, unless our military is in dire straights. I couldn't imagine what it would be like to have to send him off. I hope it never happens.
Today, I was looking around at all those dressed in uniform at the Remembrance Day gathering and felt a sense of gratitude to them and to their families. I thought about my Uncle Tom who has recenlty passed away, and the stories that he has shared about his war years. I never did say "thank you" to him. I wish I had.
As my friend D and I were walking away after the gathering, she was wiping a tear from her eye. Yup, we take for granted what we have here. Freedom. We take for granted the sacrifices that were made for us. We take for granted the sacrifices that are being made for us now. We may not agree with the circumstances that have sent our military into the current "peace keeping" situations. But we need to be supportive of the military personnel that are there now. We need to be supportive of the families that are left behind.
I am fortunate that Darren will not be deployed, unless our military is in dire straights. I couldn't imagine what it would be like to have to send him off. I hope it never happens.
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Trying to stay positive...
Just when I was feeling so positive about things, we get a note in the mail from our agency telling us to expect the wait time for our adoption to be between 18 to 24 months. Frick! From what point does that start?? Does that mean from the time we had started our homestudy? I am feeling so down about it now.I suppose that the best thing to do is to keep busy and try not to dwell on the wait. Easier said than done. My goal to do the Half Ironman in June will keep me busy. But what comes after that? Running, running and more running.
I was going to start working on the nursery this winter, but now I am rethinking that. It might be difficult having to walk by the empty nursery day after day. But on the other hand it might just keep us looking forward to the say that our daughter comes home.
I know, I know. We knew going into this that it would be a roller coaster ride. I guess that I thought the ride up would last a little longer before we hit our first downward trip. Positive thoughts, anyone?
And as soon as I asked, my very dear friend G calls and gives me some very wise words of encouragement. No matter how long it takes, it means that our little one is the one that was meant for us to have. What is meant to be, is meant to be. I'm just such a control freak, that letting go to the universe is difficult.
Monday, November 06, 2006
Did we make the right decision? Of course we did!
It's getting late and I realized that I missed posting yesterday. Bad. Must be better :)
Did we make the right decision? That is a question that keeps coming up. I ask myself this from time to time, and lately I have had that question posed to me. And the answer is consistently the same....of course we did! No regrets.
Yesterday we were at an education seminar for prospective adoptive parents. It was a very ineresting morning, and we met a lot of great people who are moving along on journies that are not unlike our own. And we met a panel of adptive parents who have adopted from the US as well as from China. There are so many roads to take along the path to adoption, you always question whether you took the right fork in the road.
People always ask why we didn't choose to adopt domestically. There are so many reasons, and very personal ones. And I have been asked on a few occasions lately if, when I see how quickly our friends' domestic adoption went, do I question or regret our path to China. The answer is "no". Absolutely not.
I am confident that we are on the right path. The process to adoption in China is a perfect fit for us. It is a well oiled machine with few bumps along the way. It's predictable (to a point) and dependable. And, we feel such a connection to it. Out there somewhere, our little baby girl will be born. A little baby girl that needs us, and that we will love deeply. And one day soon we will bring her home. I get butterflies every time I think about it!
I don't think people realize the amount of soul searching goes into the decision to adopt a child. For us, it isn't about how quickly we can have a child in our life. We have struggled this long, why rush perfection! The most important thing is that we are good parents. That we can show our little baby girl all the love that we have in our hearts. That we are good to her and to each other. And it is sooooo important that she know that her extended family love her too. That she is truely a part of our family.
I can honestly say that life is good. Very good. And it will only get better.
Did we make the right decision? That is a question that keeps coming up. I ask myself this from time to time, and lately I have had that question posed to me. And the answer is consistently the same....of course we did! No regrets.
Yesterday we were at an education seminar for prospective adoptive parents. It was a very ineresting morning, and we met a lot of great people who are moving along on journies that are not unlike our own. And we met a panel of adptive parents who have adopted from the US as well as from China. There are so many roads to take along the path to adoption, you always question whether you took the right fork in the road.
People always ask why we didn't choose to adopt domestically. There are so many reasons, and very personal ones. And I have been asked on a few occasions lately if, when I see how quickly our friends' domestic adoption went, do I question or regret our path to China. The answer is "no". Absolutely not.
I am confident that we are on the right path. The process to adoption in China is a perfect fit for us. It is a well oiled machine with few bumps along the way. It's predictable (to a point) and dependable. And, we feel such a connection to it. Out there somewhere, our little baby girl will be born. A little baby girl that needs us, and that we will love deeply. And one day soon we will bring her home. I get butterflies every time I think about it!
I don't think people realize the amount of soul searching goes into the decision to adopt a child. For us, it isn't about how quickly we can have a child in our life. We have struggled this long, why rush perfection! The most important thing is that we are good parents. That we can show our little baby girl all the love that we have in our hearts. That we are good to her and to each other. And it is sooooo important that she know that her extended family love her too. That she is truely a part of our family.
I can honestly say that life is good. Very good. And it will only get better.
Saturday, November 04, 2006
Babies, babies, babies!
This has been an exciting and nail biting past few weeks. Very close friends of ours (two couples to be exact) have been expecting their first wee ones.
We welcomed little baby Petra to the world on October 22nd. Right on schedule! She is soooo beautiful, with a full head of hair too! It has been a long journey for parents K & N to have their little one. But a long journey well worth it. We admire your strength and courage...and the ease at which you take on parenthood.
And today, our new little god daughter Lauren arrived! She came to proud parents G & G via a wonderful birth mom. OMG! Another beauty with a full head of hair. This has been a true roller coaster ride for these guys, but one that has brought a lot of love and a lot of smiles to many faces.
You know what else is funny...it seems that all the little ones who are dear to us are all girls! Briana, Brooke, Kayla, Emma, Petra and Lauren. You gals just wait until our little girl comes home. Can you imagine the pyjama parties? Oh boy.
It certainly has been a fantastic day!
We welcomed little baby Petra to the world on October 22nd. Right on schedule! She is soooo beautiful, with a full head of hair too! It has been a long journey for parents K & N to have their little one. But a long journey well worth it. We admire your strength and courage...and the ease at which you take on parenthood.
And today, our new little god daughter Lauren arrived! She came to proud parents G & G via a wonderful birth mom. OMG! Another beauty with a full head of hair. This has been a true roller coaster ride for these guys, but one that has brought a lot of love and a lot of smiles to many faces.
You know what else is funny...it seems that all the little ones who are dear to us are all girls! Briana, Brooke, Kayla, Emma, Petra and Lauren. You gals just wait until our little girl comes home. Can you imagine the pyjama parties? Oh boy.
It certainly has been a fantastic day!
Friday, November 03, 2006
Second post!
Ok...so maybe I'm turning over a new leaf. This is the second post. Could this become a new and therapeutic routine? At any rate, I hope it to be a way to keep family and friends up to date with the status quo.
I'm sitting here with our two very fluffy cats just thinking about life. You can go from years of frustration and just about hitting rock bottom to realizing that a different path can be THE way to go. Funny.
And new beginnings for some of our friends. A new little baby born n Occtober 22nd, and friends waiting patiently for their little one to arrive! Biology is soooooooo amazing, isn't it?
I love my life, I love my hubby. Who could ask for anything more?
I'm sitting here with our two very fluffy cats just thinking about life. You can go from years of frustration and just about hitting rock bottom to realizing that a different path can be THE way to go. Funny.
And new beginnings for some of our friends. A new little baby born n Occtober 22nd, and friends waiting patiently for their little one to arrive! Biology is soooooooo amazing, isn't it?
I love my life, I love my hubby. Who could ask for anything more?
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
Let the wait officially begin...
First, let me welcome you to our new blog! This will hopefully continue on and not become outdated. I'm not the best at keeping journals. Darren is better at that than I am.
We had some great news yesterday! We received news that ur dossier is on its way to China! I'm not too sure what the next step is, other than waiting patiently. Yup, the long wait begins now. I'm trying not to read the "rumour" boards, as they can really play with your emotions. We have accepted the fact that we are in for a long wait for our daughter to finally come home.
Who is up for joining us along this journey? Anyone?
We had some great news yesterday! We received news that ur dossier is on its way to China! I'm not too sure what the next step is, other than waiting patiently. Yup, the long wait begins now. I'm trying not to read the "rumour" boards, as they can really play with your emotions. We have accepted the fact that we are in for a long wait for our daughter to finally come home.
Who is up for joining us along this journey? Anyone?
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